From Crosswalk
By Dr. Gary Smalley
Can a couple in conflict ever reach a win/lose solution? What if a husband gets a new job in a different state that is going to make his life easier and the family’s life easier, but the wife doesn’t think it would be a wise move? They spend over a month in heated debate on why they should go or why they should stay. Both have legitimate reasons for their arguments, but they are clearly nowhere near a win/win solution. What do they do? How can they possibly reach a win/win solution when they are so far apart? Do they even need to reach a win/win solution?
If these questions don’t seem to have an answer, then try this one: Are you—as a married couple—on the same team? Hopefully your answer is yes, “we are on the same team”. If you truly believe you’re on the same team, then try answering the original question again. Is there ever a scenario where the resolution of your conflict might end up being a win/lose solution? If you’re on the same team, then you know what the answer is … NO!
